W.A.L.T recall events through the eyes of an animal.
Success Criteria
I know I will be successful when my recount has a
- Title
- Orientation: When? Who? Where? Why?
- Sequence of events: What happened? Describe using the senses (hear, taste, see, smell and feel).
- Personal Comment: How did the events make you feel?
First draft
The Worst day ever!
It was a normal bright and sunny day in June 17. I was just walking along the path looking for some food to eat by the lake. I’m just going to eat some grass I am going to go to my dad he has big horns I am a calf with baby horns.
I saw some lions coming towards me oh no where is my dad I am so scared I was running away from them. ‘Oh no’ they caught me the lions dragged me into the water. And the crocodile and the lion having a war.
So now the battle has ended I feel so excited that I am back with my family again.
Awesome job Genica! I really like your story. I think in your story you need to explain how the buffaloes got their calf back. I like how you introduced the story. I like when you added “So now the battle has ended I feel so excited that I am back with my family again” At the end. Well Done!
ReplyDeleteGood job genica.
ReplyDeleteI like how you made a amazing story,
I THink next time you should add a bit more detail to the story for excitement, to it, and how they got you back from the lions.
And maybe next time had some ! to your work
I like how you added one bit of excitement (word): oh no